Lam's Garden: Take-out

510 Bailey Rd.
Crystal City, Mo

Pizza Hut Supreme

Those of you that pay attention to such things might have noticed that there was not an update last week. That is due entirely to the fact that this blogging thing does not pay as well as you might think, which means I have a day job. That job occasionally requires me to work weekends, and this is why for this week, and last week, I was not able to go out with my family.
I was able to work from home, but I had appointed tasks during the dinner hours, so I had to stay put.

Pizza Hut Hot wings

Last week we picked up a couple of pizzas from Pizza Hut in Desoto. We picked up two large pizzas, a Supreme for Angel and I and a black olive and pepperoni for Adam. He doesn't like most ingredients. They also picked up some hot wings.
As I worked I munched on a couple of slices and enjoyed it thoroughly. Even better was Sunday brunch, leftover pizza, reheated.
I didn't try the wings, no  point really since the whole hot-wing thing is wasted on me. I've tried several and just have yet to see what the fuss is about. They're incredibly messy, too spicy, and there's not a lot of meat for the mess. Angel and Adam both said they were excellent though.
The pizza was very good. Plenty of toppings, spread out nicely, crust browned and just starting to crisp. There may be better pizzas around, but for taste, texture, price and location, Pizza Hut is our go-to.
This weekend was a little trickier. I suggested we have Chinese take out.
The Place:
Lam's Garden is behind Dairy Queen in Crystal city. We've gone there a few times, you can see the reviews in the archives.
The Food:

Tsao's (left) and Chicken peppersteak

My only real problem with Lam's is that I prefer a buffet when it comes to Chinese food, and Lam's is not a buffet. I like lots of different things Chinese, but strongly prefer to have a little of several things as opposed to a lot of only one thing.
There is a way around this though, take-out-family style.

Sesame Chicken

Adam ordered what he wanted most, the sesame chicken, Angel ordered what she likes best, the cashew chicken (Springfield style) They also ordered the beef broccoli to share.  I asked for two different things. I like the chicken pepper steak and I like the General Tsao. I didn't care for a lot of either, I prefer a little of one and a little of the other for balance. The pepper steak style is served with a beef-stock like sauce, like gravy, and the Tsao is sweet and spicy. They balance nicely.
Each of the orders came with rice and egg rolls or rangoons.
Angel and Adam fetched the food and brought it home. By the time they arrived I was done with my work, so I got to enjoy it at a leisurely pace. We popped open the boxes, all different stuff and voila! Instant buffet.

Cashew Chicken (pre-sauce)

We each loaded a plate with combinations of stuff, just like at a real buffet.
Most of Lam's offerings are better than their local buffet equivalent. So not only was it a buffet, it was like a premium buffet.
I plopped some rangoons, half an egg roll three styles of chicken, sesame, Tsao's and the pepper steak, then a generous portion of rice. To make it even better I used one of my Japanese plates I bought off of Ebay a few years back.

Beef Broccoli

The chickens were all excellent. The Tsao's was spicy but not too much so. The pepper steak was savory and had large scrumptious portions of peppers and onions that mixed well with the rice. The rice itself was a little bland, it lacked brightness. There were veggies mixed in, but their taste was indistinguishable from the rice itself. Shoving the pepper steak veggies into the pile fixed that problem. The rangoons were thickly loaded but in transport had lost a little crispness. The egg roll was better than many places, but not outstanding. Like the rice, the filling in the roll tasted only one flavor deep. The sesame chicken was pretty sweet, but since I only had a little it also balanced well. Usually in one-item Chinese restaurants I avoid sesame chicken to avoid the sugar high a full plate of the stuff will induce, this amount was perfect.
As I filled up on mine, I heard grunts and groans of pleasure from the others. We all agreed that this was pretty darn good.
Summary:

The result, my pretty plate!

 Lam's makes very good food and serves generous portions. Every dish is a little better than you'll find at most typical buffets, at least locally.
We ordered a lot of food and certainly paid a little more than we would have at a buffet. HOWEVER! We got about two meals each for that price, (Sunday brunch again) buffet's don't allow you to take home leftovers.
The price wasn't really all that bad, all that food for under forty dollars.
I wish their rice and egg rolls were a little better, a little fresher. I'm sure they know how to do that, but I imagine they make big batches rather than to-order. That's what it seems like in taste anyhow. We've certainly figured out how to do this though. The home-buffet was perfect, plenty of choices, of good quality Chinese fare.
I love Lam's now that I know I don't have to actually go there. 

Poppy’s Ristorante

2004 N Truman Blvd

Crystal City, MO

http://www.poppysristorante.com/

Had the weather reports earlier in the week predicted correctly, we would have been covered by nearly a foot of snow, what we had instead though was a dreary, cold rain. We need the rain, the Mighty Mississippi is low, threatening to halt barge traffic. I doubt that the heavy, prolonged showers we got on Saturday will solve the problem, but at least it would slow it down. Two days in the fifties and sixties followed by an all day rain, I wasn’t too worried about having to shovel out this weekend.

So we headed out in the cold drizzle, to Crystal City, North of the town’s center on Truman Boulevard also known as Highway 61/67.

The Place:

Adjoined to the Quonset Lanes, a bowling alley, Poppy’s is a nice place. The interior is lined and furnished with ornate heavy wood, almost church-like, very stylish. Not at all the industrial, mass-produced furnishings found at strip mall diners and cafes.

We stepped through the puddles, relieved to see the ‘Immediate Seating’ neon sign lit up. Sure enough there were several empty tables and we were led to one immediately, as promised.

We were handed menus and asked about drinks. I went out on a limb and asked for tea, Angel inquired about and ordered a Diet Dr. Pepper, and Adam a Pepsi. A few moments later Angel was informed that they were out of DDr. P, so she switched it to the full octane Dr. P.

Overhead, Sirius XM ‘The Blend’ was playing some good tunes.

The Food:

They brought the drinks and rolls, big rolls, fantastic rolls. Light, crunchy on the outside, fluffy on the inside and warm enough to melt the butter. The tea was fresh, bright and tasty.

The menu was simple and well laid out. It didn’t take very long for us to be ready to order. I’d had the cannelloni a couple of times already and was determined to have something else this time. The waitress had told us about a couple of specials, one in particular sounded pretty good. The penne pasta special  included green onions, chicken and bacon in a white sauce. I added the Greek salad.

Angel went for the Pasta Con Pesce again, a seafood and linguine plate she’d had before, and of course she added the Greek salad as well.

Adam jumped at a new (to us) item on the menu, Buffalo Chicken Penne. He added the soup instead of a salad.

Penne Special

I stole Angel’s Angry Bird Machine, her smart phone, and played a couple of rounds. I’d started playing this silly game over the holidays, a little here and there, refusing to become addicted to it. I’m not a ‘game’ person, but something about the simple concept and the ability to try a level again and again and again without penalty had hooked me for the time being. As with all other games I’ve ever played though I will surely grow bored with it pretty soon.

Pasta Con Pesce

The salads and soup arrived in good time. The salad was piled high and very pretty. There’s a problem with Poppy’s salad though, the plate is too small. To cut the pepper and onion slices means that lettuce will fall off onto the table, not a lot of working room. There’s nothing at all wrong with the freshness or the taste though, nothing at all.  There were plenty of olives as well, not those tight polished orbs you get out of a cheap jar, these were irregular, rough, and had a much deeper flavor.

Buffalo Chicken Penne

The salads and soup disappeared and shortly the main courses arrived. Heaping, steaming pastas. A LOT of pasta. My penne was creamy and smoky, with chunks of chicken and green onions and lots of bacon bits. The creamy sauce was rich and  savory, buttery. My pasta bowl was not quite as large as the other two, but I knew there was still much more than I could deal with in one sitting.

Angel never ran out of shrimp chunks. She too had to admit to defeat though, there was enough pasta on our three plates to feed Europe.

Adam picked through his, I could tell something was wrong. I finally pried it out of him. “I’m not a big  Ranch Dressing guy.” 

He likes hot wings and said that sure enough the hot-wing taste was consistent and the spiciness was not overpowering. They had laid on as a sauce, a big dollop of ranch. Though the tastes were all as-advertised it was simply a better plan on paper than in execution.

We asked for two boxes, Adam wasn’t taking his leftovers home.

Summary:

A few minor points, but otherwise Poppy’s is a place we like quite well.

While we were dining, three or four uniformed staff members gathered at a table near the door.  This is usually a big no-no in higher end places. One reason is that, sure enough, the ladies eventually started talking about work and some of the customers, dirty laundry being aired in front of paying guests. They weren’t too loud really, but if I were the owner I don’t think I’d like them talking shop in the dining area like that. It’s just not good form.

The biggest complaint we had though was the portions. This is a silly thing to consider a problem, but it is something Poppy’s may want to take a look at. There’s no fixed formula, but if the majority of your guests are boxing up half or more of their meal, you might reconsider portion size.

Pasta is heavy, the sauces are rich and creamy. Milk-based sauces don’t digest/break down quickly. For that reason that it’s far easier to quickly drink a gallon of water or even beer than it is to drink a gallon of milk. In fact, it is nearly impossible. Ergo, milk/cream and cheesy sauces are much, much more ‘filling’ than tomato based sauces.
There’s simply no profit in sending half meals out the door, even though the price is not really bad.

Our meal cost us fifty five and change, it would have been ten dollars less had we remembered to bring our coupon. We’re on their mailing list and they send out coupons fairly often, though we never seem to remember to take them.

Poppy’s is a very good place. The food is awesome, there’s simply too much of it if that sort of thing can be considered a problem. The décor is classy, different and quite nice, the staff, aside from the front of house get-togethers were all professional and efficient. I highly recommend this place, the food is much better than and price-comparable to the franchise sports bars.

Lam's Garden

510 Bailey Rd
Crystal City, Mo

Yeah, I know, chronologically it looks like we’ve been spending a lot of time at Chinese places.  That’s because we were in Springfield, Mo. a few weeks ago and one simply must have Chinese there, and that sort of gave us an appetite for more. However last week we didn’t have Chinese, we went to Ruby Tuesday’s thanks to a generous gift card from my lovely and sweet sister. I didn’t write it up since we were there in November, so I told the family I’d only write it up if there were any significant changes or occurrences. There weren’t.  It was a good meal.

The Place:

Lam’s is a little tough to find behind the storefronts on Main Street. There’s plenty of parking. The exterior walls were adorned with modest murals and signage, just inside the front door was a large, heavily and stylishly decorated Christmas tree. At the counter there was a smaller white plastic one. Apparently the colorful Chinese calendars were being ignored. Large, red paper lanterns hung from the ceiling, I don’t think they were part of the holiday decorations. There were lots of tables in the front and off to the side a row of booths. The booth table tops were laminated with glossy, colorful murals of waterfalls.

Lam’s is not a buffet, so we were handed menus. I prefer buffets, and the rest of this review will make it very clear why.

The Food:

Green pepper steak

I struggled with the menu. One protein, one of two kinds of rice, and a choice of either two crab Rangoons two wontons, or an egg roll.  Angel suggested that we get some half-order sides to fill out the meal, add some variety. We ordered our drinks and were shortly given our tea, Diet Coke and Coke. Fortunately the tea was clear and not too bad, I’d had concerns. We asked for a little more time with the menus though I was the only actual holdout, Angel and Adam had pretty much walked in with their orders in mind. Last time we were at Lam’s I’d had the chicken pepper steak and found it okay, but as the only protein, too much savory. I considered sweet and sour but Lam’s uses that heavily tempura-battered style of cooking the chicken for that dish, it makes the chicken look like mini corn dogs, too bready.

General Tsao

The choice for me narrowed to sesame and General Tsao. The problem I had with the General is that they put some heat into that, and depending where you are, maybe a bit too much heat. The problem with sesame is that some places make that way too sweet. Then Angel suggested that half order of something else, like beef pepper steak. That seemed like a good fit to cut the sweet of the sesame. My mind was tacitly made up by the time the lady returned for our order. We went around the table.

Angel, unsurprisingly asked for the cashew style chicken since Lam’s uses a recipe that is similar to what they use in Springfield. (Emphasis on the word ‘similar’) She asked for the egg roll which surprised me a little, she’s very picky about egg rolls. (Canton Inn in Springfield being the benchmark.) She added the pepper beef and added a half order of beef and broccoli. She told the lady to not bring rice with the two half-orders. Adam ordered the General Tsao’s which I appreciated, it would give me a chance to taste it in case the sesame disappointed or for the next time we went there. He asked for plain rice instead of fried rice, since he doesn’t like little extras like veggie chunks, egg, and flavor in his rice.

“That’s a lot of food!” the middle aged Chinese seemed impressed.

“We share.” Angel replied to try to make us not look like porcine gluttons.

Beef and broccoli

For the short wait we discussed entertainment options for later in the evening. It was decided to stop at Blockbuster on the way out of town. I don’t like going to Blockbuster, it’s depressing. Blockbuster is well past its prime, and it shows. The overhead TV’s are all big CRT types, the type that even the most run down of bars got rid of nearly five years ago. The shelves, once proud of their status as cutting edge with the latest in movies are half bare, unable to keep up with the newer, alternative media formats. Much the way Blockbuster all but wiped out locally owned, mom and pop video stores, they themselves have now been outdone.

The food arrived in two deliveries. It all looked very good. There also seemed to be a lot of it. Lam’s portions are generous and three full meals plus two half orders filled the table.

Cashew Chicken

I cautiously tried the sesame chicken. Good, not too sweet. The chicken chunks were quite large, I’d rather see them a bit smaller. Each nugget required double cutting.

The fried rice was brown, too brown. Sure enough to my taste buds they had overdone the soy sauce. There were indeed chunks of veggie and egg in the rice, but it all tasted the same due to the sauce.

The pepper beef veggies were spot on, the sauce seemed just right and the peppers and onions were cooked, just barely, just right. The beef itself though was a bit…. And I’m reluctant to say this, too salty.

Sesame Chicken

Working the sweet/savory/sweet/savory worked for a while. The first thing I gave up on was the beef though, followed shortly by the rice. I used the pretty-good but not great egg roll to cut the sweet, but halfway in had to give that up as well.

Angel and Adam didn’t seem to have the problem. They lapped theirs up at full speed without complaint.

I tried the cashew and the General chicken. I thought the General was quite good, not too hot as I’d worried. The cashew style was weak, tame. It had the taste of the Springfield style, but not as strong. It was a lot like brown gravy. Angel said that it was good, almost light. Adam said his General Tsao tasted great, but the chunks themselves were too fatty. As for the egg roll, I asked the expert. She shrugged. They both agreed that the broccoli on their dishes was great. (blech).

Summary:

The staff at Lam's is unbeatable, my favorite part of the experience. They're affable, energetic and enthusiastic. Always at the ready to whisk away a plate or refill a drink.

We discussed the food, specifically my less-than-stellar opinion of it  like this like it was a serious family problem. They were quite pleased with the meal, I was not. Angel was keen on the fact that I seemed to have an over-active sensitivity to saltiness. I can’t disagree completely, of all the things I’ve ever railed about in all these reviews, too salty is the top of the list, by more than a mile. So keep that in mind. I rarely if ever add salt at the table to anything. If you do add salt to things then understand that my sensitivity is more than yours and adjust my review to that perspective. They thoroughly enjoyed the meal, I simply didn’t.

Thus the discussion about buffets. If this were a buffet, I could have sampled a little of a dozen or so things, pushed aside the rejects and seconded on the better choices. Perhaps I’m spoiled by buffets. Why this applies to Chinese food and not other styles I’m not sure. I’ve been to several buffets where I didn’t care for one thing or another, but just went with something else and was quite happy.

Then there was the price. Chinese food is almost always a bargain. We can eat at a buffet, or even Lam’s for half what we pay at Ruby Tuesday’s. I can only fairly compare Chinese to Chinese. We had to over-order at Lam’s to get a reasonable variety. Thus the bill came in at over thirty five dollars, nearly ten dollars more than the buffet down the road.

So for me, Lam’s is not worth it. It's only a little better, to me, than the little Chinese restaurant in Hillsboro. You order a dish that isn’t quite to your liking after all, and you’re done.  I’m sure many people enjoy Lam’s, Angel and Adam certainly do. But if it is ever up to me to choose a Chinese place, it will be a buffet, almost any buffet.

Bandana’s Bar-B-Q

103 Truman Blvd
Crystal City, MO

http://www.bandanasbbq.com/

 

To celebrate Adam’s upcoming birthday* we let him choose a place. I know, it was probably his turn anyhow, but it’s the thought that counts, right? We did tell him there was no pressure to find a new place, he didn’t need to consider the review at all, even if it was a place we’d been to recently. Free choice without pressure or repercussions, that’s the greatest gift of all.

I was a little surprised when he chose Bandana’s but only a little. I knew he liked it, but not that it was at the top of his list.

I had been shopping earlier in the day, mostly finished but a little frustrated. None of the stores I went to had those big cans of popcorn, the ones with three kinds, cheddar, plain and caramel. Granted, I’d only gone to two stores, but for me that’s an ambitious shopping trip.

The evening was simply gorgeous. The setting sun enflamed the few wispy clouds, the temperature was nearly perfect, high fifty’s or low sixty’s. The drive was uneventful and rather quiet. On arrival I was expecting the outdoor loudspeaker to be blasting that awful country music. I was pleased to note they’d turned it down considerably from the hideous shouting level it had been set to on our previous trips. Inside it was pleasantly, barely audible at all.

The Place:

It was only half full, or maybe less. Not bustling, a very relaxed pace. The place was only modestly decorated, felt red stockings hung from above the opening to the kitchen, each with a name written on it, maybe one per crew member. A small tree sat in a corner and that was pretty much it.

A few families were spread around the long aisles, the black-clad crew scurried about clearing tables, sweeping the floor, carrying orders.

We were shown a booth near the back and situated ourselves. The menus were dropped off, drinks ordered (tea, sweet tea and Pepsi) and the server drifted off and left us to consider options.

The birthday boy, and my tea.

Our drinks arrived quickly, we weren’t quite ready to order yet. It took another five minutes or so before we finally decided. After much internal debate, I chose the turkey sandwich and fries. Angel, the chicken and pork plate with ‘fried corn’ and fried okra. Adam went for the beef and chicken plate with fries and coleslaw.

While we waited, in what has become a sort of ritual, Angel pulled out her new-fangled smartphone, checked her Facebook and email, then browsed through some online comics. Adam didn’t. Instead he occupied himself tearing the straw wrappers into tiny little shreds, then rolling the shreds up into tiny little balls.

Angel then showed Adam one of the comic strips, he seemed only slightly amused. “Comics are for old people.” He said, which caused his mother to get all red-faced and defensive. “I didn’t mean old like you, I mean old-old.” He defended himself, though it didn’t really help.

I think he was just trying to get a rise from her. He does that a lot, something he inherited from his mother. She’s always trying to rile me up, pointing out petty infractions and forgetfulness, just trying to ring my buzzer; I don’t take the bait though.

The Food:

Turkey Sandwich, pre-sauce

The food arrived quickly, just as advertised. There are no surprises at Bandana’s, just tasty smoked meats.

The meat is served dry allowing one to sauce it up to individually desired levels. They provide four different sauces at each table, I think there used to be more.  I’d tasted them all before and went with my favorite, Chicago Sweet, and plenty of it. This doesn’t mask the smokiness of the meat, it’s chopped into thick chunks, it merely perfects it. My bun was toasted and buttered, the fries were  just right.

Angel’s fried corn turned out to be corn on the cob, cooked, then grill-fried until most of the individual kernels were a light brown. It was diapered on the plate in what looked like an oblong coffee filter. We debated this, and decided that it might not actually have been a coffee filter since we couldn’t figure out how or why a coffee maker would require an oblong filter. On subsequent research, and playing off a brilliant hunch, I looked up 'restaurant supplies' and ‘hot dog wrappers’ and sure enough, voila! You can see them here.

Fried corn on the cob.

The corn itself was very good. I know this because Angel said it was almost as good as Jeff’s. Jeff is my younger, but bigger brother. He smokes meats himself but unfortunately he lives a couple of hundred miles away in the sprawling metropolis of Cerulean Ky. When he prepares a meal he puts his heart and soul into it. Lots of planning, hand chosen wood, days of preparation. His corn is indeed awesome. For Bandana’s to come even close by comparison is quite a commendation.

Her okra looked just like it tastes, like breaded and deep-fried cow snot.

Adam tried his coleslaw then never touched it again. I asked him about that. “It’s not their fault, I’m just really, really picky about coleslaw.” He responded without further explanation. He is indeed rather picky about certain foods, another unfortunate trait he gets from his mother.

Adam asked me about the tea. “Flat, tasteless, but I knew it would be.”

“Then why did you order it?” he asked as if the answer wasn’t obvious.

“I had to see if they bothered to improve it, they haven’t.”

He doesn’t seem to understand the harsh sacrifices that are required to become a professional, highly rated and respected restaurant critic.

Summary:

The food was, as I’ve said, very good. Adam didn’t like the coleslaw, but even he properly blamed that on flawed genetics rather than a failed effort by Bandana’s. The tab was a bit high, forty six dollars before the tip, but good food is good food, and really good comestibles** are worth a few extra farthings.

After we finished we hopped over to Big Lot’s to see if they had the tins of popcorn. Nope. The next day, on a tip form Angel, I found some at K-Mart. Mission accomplished.

_______________________________

* Birthday.  Adam’s is the day after mine but we agreed to split the celebrations. He would choose a place to eat, I’d choose a movie to go to. None of these celebrations would actually occur on our actual birthdays. We’ll be going to see “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” on Friday.

**Comestibles. An established author and Facebook friend Nicola Griffith used this word in a post last week. I had to look it up since I’ll admit that there are a still a few (a couple of dozen at most) pretentious English words missing from my otherwise vast arsenal. I thanked her for the generous gift and assured her that I would try to use it in the near future. This almost-superfluous usage was an intentional means of increasing my word power (it pays). As for ‘farthings’, I only need to mention that this same friend is British by birth.

Poppy’s Ristorante

2000 N. Truman Rd.

Crystal City, Mo

http://www.poppysparlor.com

We’re back!

Thanksgiving weekend we didn’t go out, no need to, we’re crazy for turkey leftovers. Last week Angel and Adam were in Springfield, Mo. to attend a baby shower for her son and daughter-in-law’s fairly soon to arrive daughter. I stayed at the compound and attended to the needs of the seven or nine dogs, subsisting on home-made Chinese, rice, sweet/sour chicken and turkey-scrap wontons. Angel and Adam would be having the real deal, as is tradition whenever any of us go to Springfield . She would be bringing some back, which is mandatory, and I wanted to compare my rice to the Queen City’s best effort.

Earlier in the week I received an email from Poppy’s, a free pasta dish coupon on account of my upcoming birthday. I’d filled out a card last time we were there. I even entered my actual birthday on it. Sometimes I am less than honest when filling out those things. Usually I also put a phone number that is less than completely accurate. The number is in my name, it’s just that it’s only connected to a fax machine that Angel uses for her business. It’s usually turned off anyhow. And the email address I give out goes to an account that I only check once per week or so. I don’t know why I go to such great strides to mask my true identity, just habit I guess. Oh yeah, and because I don’t like junk-mail and solicitor phone calls. The fake birthday thing I can’t really explain though.

So with the coupon, I figured this was a sign from above that we should go to Poppy’s. Actually it’s more a technical feature of Poppy’s marketing strategy than divine behavior, but still, it solved the problem of where to go. I’ll probably get more of these things over the next few months from other restaurants as my many fake birthdays approach.

The Place:

The place is gorgeous, charming, warm and welcoming. Hard to imagine from the inside that it’s next door to a bowling alley. Go to the place’s web site to see some pictures if you haven’t already. Wood, lots of wood. The centerpiece, a thick German-looking stag-adorned mirrored hutch is prominent. The artwork is classy and well thought out.

It was about half-full when we got there, which was a bit later than usual. Angel needed to make a quick stop on the way to pick up some medicine for one of the dogs. Poor Deedee was suffering from a bug and exploding from all ends earlier in the day and Angel’s friend and comrade from CARE had just the dope she needed.  Unfortunately, since CARE’s shelter is well south of DeSoto in Washington County, this meant it was not really ‘on the way’ at all, it was in fact about an hour and a half from the time we left the house till we got to Crystal City. For those of you in Kentucky, it would be like driving to Hopkinsville by way of Mayfield, or in southern Maryland, like going to Annapolis via D.C.

Poppy’s is beautiful though, and they make awesome food.

As could be expected, there was Christmas music playing softly throughout, not a bad mix altogether although when ‘Santa Baby’ came on I wanted to throw a chair at something.*

The Food:

I wanted something different, so I scanned back in my top-secret notebook to see what I’d had the last time. Cannelloni, loved it. Adam asked for what he’d ordered as well, and recalled it fondly.

Scanning the menu anew I was rather indecisive. We ordered our tea, tea and Coke and shortly they arrived along with a basket of rolls and faux-butter packets. The rolls were near baseball sized and not too fluffy. They were not heavy at all but they were more substantial than the flour clouds that some places serve. I finally decided on the Shrimp Fettuccine, the waitress returned to take our orders. I let Angel order first, since I’m a proper gentleman, and as she spoke I looked down at the menu once again. The description of the Fettuccine popped up at me: Shrimp, mushroom, garlic, broccoli in a light cream sauce with provel cheese. I panicked. It was my turn to order having just discovered that my chosen dish was contaminated with broccoli! 

“And for you sir?” The young lady asked.

“Uh, the uh, Cannelloni.”

That’s right, I once again crumpled under the enormous pressure.

Angel looked at me, baffled, after I finished my order.

“I thought you were going to get something different.” She scolded.

“I’m fine.” I replied confidently.

Greek Salad

Angel and I had ordered the Greek Salad as a side, Adam the cheese, potato and bacon soup. Angel and Adam’s meal allowed for two sides, they each chose the day’s vegetable, broccoli.

The salads and soup arrived in good time, while waiting Angel and Adam played with their phone apps again, leaving me to scan the room and quietly absorb the ambiance. My phone doesn’t have apps, or a data plan, it may as well have a rotary dial and hopelessly tangled cord.

The bread was awesome, the salad delightful, with just one problem. The crisp and attractive salad was served on a saucer and was piled too high. Cutting the red pepper ring could not be done without considerable spillage.  It was quite tasty, almost as good as Trattoria Giuseppe’s, but the presentation, though cute, was a fail due to the messy top-heaviness of it.

The main courses arrived shortly after the salad and soup dishes were pushed aside. I had asked Adam about his soup.

“It was potato, cheese and bacon, what could possibly be wrong?”  Was his snarky answer. He gets his snarkiness from his mother.

Cannelloni

The cannelloni is a tube pasta, filled with beef, veal and chicken, covered in a red sauce and melted provel cheese. Provel is a St. Louis area specialty, you won’t find it many other places. It is not made around here, it’s just a blend of cheddar, Swiss and provolone that is made for the region due to the local differently-sophisticated tastes. It’s a hallmark of St. Louis style pizza. I’m not a huge fan of it, though it isn’t disgusting. I just find it a bit rich and overpowering. I’m no cheese snob though, I grew up on the stuff labeled ‘Individually wrapped, processed American cheese product’ which also means ‘not really cheese’.

Chicken Terazzini

Angel had ordered the Chicken Terazzini, Lightly breaded, fried , on a bed of spaghetti and a white cream sauce with fresh sea clams. Adam got the Chicken Alfredo, charbroiled  or lightly breaded, fried, topped with a blend of cheese and cream sauce on a bed of spaghetti. (He chose ‘fried’)

My portions were deceptively sized, they seemed small, but the sweetness and richness of the sauces filled me up in no time. It might have had something to do with the bowl of chili I’d had a few hours earlier. I couldn’t finish, and the heaviness was starting to make my cardio system ache, but there was it was actually very, very good.

Adam seemed to suffer a similar issue. “Heavy, a bit too cheesy, I should have gone for grilled.” He said as he pushed the not-quite-cleaned plate aside. Angel was still going gangbusters though, even dipping her disgusting broccoli into the creamy pasta sauce.

Summary:

Poppy’s is very, very good. It is also very, very rich. Do not go there if you’ve already had something heavy that day. Save it for the rich, creamy, heavy main course. The tastes are multi-dimensional and consistent. It’s a beautiful, classy yet casual place, staffed well. The price is not out of whack, especially if it’s your birthday. The original ticket said forty-seven dollars, but the final, discounted price was thirty-six. The food is top shelf, the menu is not cluttered. Highly recommended, we would happily take guests there.

BTW Last weekend Angel brought back some rice from Springfield, I compared, I liked mine better.

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*’Santa Baby’: I’ve always hated this song, I didn’t know why until a couple of years ago after I spent some time trying to figure out why this one, more so than even ‘Grandma got run over by a reindeer’ made me clench my fists. I think it has to do with the fake, cheap, lazy use of the word ‘tonight.’  It’s at the end of every verse. It doesn’t rhyme with anything else in the song. It’s used as a replacement, a fake rhyme in place of a rhyming word because the writers, J. Javits and P. Springer, just  weren’t very good at writing songs. I’ve noticed this sort of lazy fakery in other songs too, just not as prevalent. It’s as grating to me as listening to a teenager improperly use the word ‘like’ more than five times per sentence. “And I was like ‘whatever’, and he was like ‘sure thing’, and I was like ‘I know!’. . .”

Ruby Tuesday's

I’ve mentioned before that this whole exercise, to find different places to eat came about after experiences at Ruby Tuesday’s. Our first meal there was phenomenal, but three attempts to recapture that excellence each ended in frustration.
On Saturday we had planned to try an Italian place a client of Angel’s had recommended, not only did he offer a recommendation; he backed it up with a gift certificate. The accompanying card advised to call ahead for reservations. When Angel did so on Saturday afternoon, she was told that the place was not taking reservations for the times we requested five to six PM. They suggested either four PM (too early) or seven PM (too late).
This left us blank, none of us could come up with an alternative. So we did what we had done so many times in the past, we defaulted to an old familiar. This is one of the problems with a household made up completely of introverts.* This is how we ended up at RT’s.

The Place:
Between Lowes and Intestate 55 in Festus, the large parking lot on this very chilly evening** was nearly but not completely full. We were ushered immediately to a table, past the very item that Angel likes the most about this place, the salad bar. I have to admit it’s a pretty darn good one.
We were seated and handed our menus in a booth along the drafty windows. We were directly beneath a speaker that was belting out just a little too loudly seventies and eighties mild rock. Some of the songs were okay, some were Disco. At a distance there was a professional football game playing on TV screens but not close enough to maintain an interest or cause frustration or distress.
Along the walls were Sports-Americana items, oars, skates, sleds, framed jerseys and posters and photos of sports-related people. The lighting was provided by suspended lamps with dim bulbs hanging over the tables.
The Food:
The menus had changed a little in the months since we last ventured there. We noted the addition of lobster in various configurations. This was very tempting, we lunged at it.
Angel and I both ordered the sirloin and lobster with the salad bar of course. We also asked for the creamy mashed potatoes and the sautéed green beans with onion straws.
The disappointment began exactly at this point. We were informed that they no longer served the sautéed green beans with onion straws, a side I absolutely loved. This sent our faces back into the menu where Angel came out first calling out ‘snap peas’. In my mind they were the same color as green beans generally the same shape so I too requested them.
Adam ordered the buffalo chicken mini sandwiches with fries, no salad bar.
Of course tea, tea and Coke. The tea was fresh, bright and excellent. I suspect it is something other that Lipton, though I do not know for sure.
The salad bar as I said is among the best I’ve come across anywhere. The selection is all fresh and plentiful. There is some iceberg lettuce but it is just one form of leafy green among many. I chose the other stuff; I don’t know what it’s called, romaine etc. and plenty of spinach. As for toppings there are many. I tonged up about twenty grape tomatoes, bacon chunks, cucumbers, bell peppers, mushrooms, two types of shredded cheese, a spoonful each of dirty potato salad and apple salad. This was topped by a small dose my favorite two-dressing combo, Thousand Island and Bleu Cheese.
Angel timidly picked through her preferences then went nasty on the croutons. Her and Adam rave about the croutons there, I don’t care for them. They are very dark and to me seem to have the consistency of small chunks of a radial tire. She doubled, tripled up on those since she knew Adam would pluck most of them. She insists the croutons are the best anywhere, I recognize and respect her inalienable right to be completely wrong about certain things.
I tried to not eat my entire salad, saving room for the steak and lobster, but I failed miserably. Everything was so fresh and so good that it was not possible to leave much on the plate. As predicted Adam took about half of the croutons off Angel’s salad.
The wait for our meals was longer than usual. The music slid unmercifully into a meandering, mind bruising Whitney Houston ballad followed by an equally grating, sappy love song from Peter Cetera.
When the main courses finally arrived the salad was a barely remembered thing of the past. The first thing I did after checking for the rareness of my steak was to try the peas. They were in a word, awful. Green peas are potentially overpowering among more subtle flavors. It only takes a few in a stir fry or stew to completely take over the dish. Here on my plate, still in the pods were a big pile of them, and there they stayed. Too sweet, too strong and the texture was that of parboiled slugs.
The creamy mashed potatoes at RT’s are the absolute best I recall having anywhere; very smooth and creamy, slightly, only slightly herbed, simply dreamy. Had they taken them off the menu I would have stormed out and burned the place down.
The steak was cooked perfectly; unfortunately the beef itself was quite less than first rate. I’ve had worse to be sure (Cracker Barrel), but this one was just a little too tough; not enough marbling, the obvious sign of significantly less than grade AAA beef. It was far from awful though.
The lobster was surprising in more than one way. First there were three lobster tails in shells. Don’t be alarmed, they were tiny; only about three to four inches long and only about a half inch in diameter. I’ve had crawdads this size. The other surprise was that they were fantastic! Perfectly cooked, subtly seasoned and generously buttered. They complemented the so-so steak exactly as some high god or another intended the notion of surf and turf to do.
Angel’s delight and surprise was the same as mine. We wolfed it all down rather quickly leaving behind entire portions of the peas and desperate fingernail and tooth marks on the tiny lobster shells. Adam left nothing behind; the small spicy chicken sandwiches suited him just fine.

Summary:
All in all it was a pretty good meal; less so for the price. This is among the pricier of the chain restaurants/sports bars. Ruby Tuesday’s is currently under an up-scaling mission reaching out to the upper-upper middle class a little more. In my mind they are pennies away from pricing themselves out of the local market. With tip the meal for three totaled nearly seventy dollars. At that price range, the steaks need to be better quality and the lobster needs to be closer to actual size. The salad bar is beyond compare though, even with the Goodyear croutons.
I will score this experience, primarily against itself. I have had a perfect meal at RT’s, once. This visit would rate at best an eighty five. The snap peas, the lesser quality of the meat and the overall expense weighed heavily.
We will probably go back, the salad bar calls to us. As for recommending to others, yeah, sure, maybe. By that I mean that if someone were to suggest taking me there, I’d accept.


* Introverts: Based on Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) assessment tests.

** “Very chilly” is an understatement. At the time of this outing the area had been suffering through more than a week of brutal, soul-sucking cold temperatures. Only once in the previous six to eight days had the thermometer ventured near twenty degrees and on that day it was blustery and it dropped more than three inches of dry thin snow, the consistency of shredded ice. Most days topped out in the low teens. At these temperatures even a mild breeze turns the air into razorblades. The draftiness of the windows mentioned later in the review was more a result of the extreme outside temperature than the quality of windows.