Lorenzo's Italian Kitchen

106 S. Main
Desoto, Mo.
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Finally, finally, I was free of my work-leash for a proper outing. I'd worked some earlier in the day, but finished up sometime after noon.
This was a last minute decision. Seriously last minute. The best we could get Angel to do was to spit out three or four places, I picked this one from that list.
The Place:
Main Street in Desoto is old school, mid twentieth century style. The street itself runs alongside and parallel to the many railroad sidings that make up the busy maintenance facility. There are only businesses on one side of most of Main Street. It's a  charming small town and it has been getting a period-reflective update. Old style street lamps, etc. Angel occasionally takes dogs she's training along the sidewalk. Traffic, foot traffic, it's good for a dog to learn how to act around unexpected and unfamiliar, for a dog, common people places.
Lorenzo's is one of the many small shops tucked away in an narrow older building. When we walked in, there were only a couple of tables occupied. I knew this would soon change though. They'd announced live music on the patio starting at six. We were an hour ahead of them.
A beautiful day, not too warm, but not chilly, sunny with occasional fluffy clouds overhead.
The place is cozy. I can think of no other word for it.
The walls are wainscoted in dark wood, the upper walls painted the color of ripe tomatoes. Furniture is black, booths, tables and chairs. The shirts and half-aprons worn by the staff were also black.
We were shown a booth near the back and fell into our seats. "Katie will be with you shortly." the hostess said.
And she was, a happy looking young lady stepped up and asked about drinks. Tea, sweet tea, Root Beer.
She skipped off and we started going over the menus.
I'd had the pizza before, it was very good. I think I had pasta there, though I couldn't recall wish dish. Pasta sounded good though.
Katie brought our drinks and we ordered an appetizer that we'd just been discussing.
The Food:
Of course they serve toasted ravioli, everyone for dozens of miles around serves that. Lorenzo's has that along with their own 'in-your-face' alternative, toasted cannelloni.
It's prepared the same way, but instead of ravioli they stuff a tube-pasta and cut it into bite-size bits. We recalled having them on a prior visit and all agreed.
When the time to order the entrees came, we were ready.
I wasn't real hungry, I'd made a big breakfast for myself that morning after everyone else had left. Adam had to work, Angel was out pimping mutts at an adoption event at Buchheit's in Herculaneum. She's done these things a lot over the last ten years or so. They take a lot of time, a lot of her energy, but occasionally they place a dog. This was a good day, they found homes for two
We ordered.
Me: Baked Cannelloni.
Angel: Mare Monti (a seafood and pasta dish)
Adam: Calzone with bacon, pepperoni and sausage.
A calzone is a fancy name for a folded over pizza. (see picture) You could also say that pizza is an open faced calzone.
We all declined a salad, then out came the electronic devices.
The tea wasn't especially good, but the toasted cannelloni  was exceptional. Some places barely even try on these appetizers, Lorenzo's cares.The house-made sauce is much better than the generic stuff offered at most restaurants. The stuffed pasta bits were gone in no time at all.
After a short while, just as the tables started filling up, the food was served. Simple, uncluttered plates, the food needed little extra flare or fanfare.

Cannelloni

Adam's calzone looked a bit like an upscale Hot Pocket. Angel's Mare was almost soup-like, my cannelloni was hard to see buried under thick, oozy sauce and melted white cheese.
I'd originally thought spaghetti, but the pasta to sauce/cheese ratio was a bit high. Cannelloni has only a little actual pasta, only enough to wrap the seasoned beef, chicken and veal insides. It's still a rich dish, but not as filling.
Angel's dish, Mare Monti has no actual horse in it.(much to my disappointment) The menu described it as Chopped clams, shrimp, real crab meat, fresh mushrooms and

Mare Monti

diced tomato, tossed in a light seafood broth and topped with fresh parsley. Meaning of course, I would never order it for myself, it's the clams.
She sucked it down though, first picking at the individual seafood bits, and slurping the pasta, then dipping her bread into the remaining sauce. "I'd like to just pick the plate up and slurp it all down." She said, she really, really liked the fish sauce.
I chopped up my pasta tubes once I found them. The stringy melted cheese made it a bit awkward to eat, but Lorenzo's is a casual place, things like slurping and dangling cheese bridges from mouth to plate is
perfectly acceptable. The sauce was awesome, sweet but not too sweet, it certainly hit several notes that sounded like 'fresh'. The meat was not too spicy, the texture of the blend of three meats was flawless, almost buttery.

Calzone

While I was eating I noticed the music I'd been rather enjoying. Big bands and crooners from a time before my own. When I do listen to or download music, this is among my favorite types. I really like the old guys from the 40's and 50's, Frank Sinatra, Bing Crosby, Tony Bennett. I like the contemporary crooners as well, Harry Connick Jr, Michael Buble and Tony Bennett. The music was orchestrated and peppy. It fit in this old place.
Of course, Adam liked his calzone, which looked thick and rich as well.


Summary:
The place was starting to fill up as we finished. A large family with a couple of adorable children scooted a

couple of tables together. I say the tots were adorable, which means they stayed at the other end of the dining area. Distance definitely makes small kids more appealing.
Katie took very good care of us. Everything arrived in a timely manner, exactly as ordered. She checked on us frequently and didn't dawdle when it came time for the check.
The entire staff was friendly and attentive. They all seemed to be enjoying themselves and the many customers.
The food was simply outstanding and not overpriced. Our tab came in at only $41, less than we'd spend at one of the franchised casual dining places. From the quaint and cozy location, to the excellent staff, to the exceptional food, there's absolutely nothing I can't happily recommend about Lorenzo's.
Okay the tea wasn't great, but that may be deliberate. They offer lots of wines and beers there, a lot of choices. Maybe next time I'll have a more mature drink.

Burger King

802 Lee Ave.

Festus, Mo

www.bk.com

Yeah, I know, Burger King. Meh.

But here’s the thing. New fries. A few weeks back BK splashed the news that they were revamping the ubiquitous side dish. This is HUGE! You think it’s easy to come up with a new process for dumping handfuls of sliced potatoes into a deep fryer?

Plus, last time we did BK we tried some of their newer burger offerings so we decided to stick to the flagships this time.

Usually when I go to BK I get the fish sandwich. I have nothing bad to say about that offering at all. I hadn’t been since the new-fries came out though.

The Place:

It’s a Burger King, look at the one nearest you, yeah it’s just like that.

The Food:

Fancy tea dispenser

Angel ordered a Whopper, Adam the ‘tender crisp’ chicken sandwich, I went off plan and asked for the “Chef’s Choice” burger (though it has more meat than a whopper, it’s a leaner meat and actually contains fewer calories.) We all opted for the fries, of course, and tea. Regular for Angel and me, sweet for Adam. The tea was offered up through an electro-mechanical machine that let you choose between three types.

While at the condiment/drink counter Angel filled up six little paper cups with ketchup.

Seating was easy, only a two or three groups of people were there. We sat and placed our plastic ‘55’ tag at one corner and waited.

Ketchup, right before Angel
swore at me for taking her picture

We were prepared for the wait. For Christmas I’d picked up a little card game for Angel’s stocking, a version of “Would You Rather”. The deal is that there are questions on the card and no right or wrong answers. The point is to start pointless conversations.

“Would you rather have one slow child and one really-smart child, or two average children?”

That one was fun considering we were playing the game with one of our children.

“Would you rather live next door to a landfill or a cemetery?”

We split on this one. Obviously I like cemeteries and attach no superstition to them, Angel though, hates them. She’d actually live next door to, or in a landfill rather than go anywhere near a cemetery. I knew this already. It’s one of the reasons I picked up the hobby of going to cemeteries and finding/photographing tombstones. I never have to worry about her wanting to tag along.

Chef's Choice and New fries

The food came pretty quickly. I tried the fries first. They were indeed thicker, which meant they retained their heat longer. CAUTION! They retain their heat longer! So I let them cool a bit before biting into the next one. As for taste, my initial reaction was they tasted just like burnt flesh.

The burger looked good. It, like Adam’s chicken, was served on an ‘artisan bun’ which I assumed to mean that it was shaped a little different than a regular bun, it didn’t taste any different, though it is rumored to be made with potatoes. Something did seem different though. The burger initially tasted a little smoky, then a little bitter. I couldn’t figure it out at first. The more of it I ate, the less I liked it. It was the sauce. Not like ‘special sauce’ at McDonald’s, which is really pretty much Thousand Island dressing, this stuff was not at all sweet, it was smoky, faux-smoky. It was also a sickly gray-brown in color, which didn’t help. I researched this sauce later and found that whatever it is, BK’s not giving out the recipe, or even listing the ingredients, other than mayo, onion and garlic. I didn’t even sense those flavors. At the table I asked Angel and Adam to taste it, they couldn’t put a finger on it either. I never finished my burger because of it. In fact I couldn’t get the taste out of my system enough to want to eat anything else. Fortunately I’d consumed most of my fries by this point and can report to you that the new fries are indeed different. They’re definitely thicker, and seem to be crispier than the forgettable old style. I also detected a sweetness to them, probably from whatever exotic oil they cook them in. They had too much taste. Fries are great even if you just cut up a potato and deep fry them in Canola or vegetable oil at home. Whatever this new technique is distorts the flavor further than a basic side dish needs to be messed with. They weren’t bad at all, they just seemed fake.  Angel’s response to them was: “They went for texture over taste, they don’t taste potato-ey”

Tender Crisp Chicken Sandwich

Angel also said her Whopper was disappointing. “It wasn’t as messy and drippy as they used to be.”  She added:  “Nor was it as flame-broiled tasting as I remember them.”

I asked Adam about his chicken sandwich. “It’s fast food.” Was all I got, delivered with a shrug of his shoulders.

Oh and the tea? It had flavor, not bitter or flat, but not a great flavor. Acceptable.

Summary:

I opened this missive using the neo-word ‘meh’. It’s a word popularized by the cultural phenomenon “The Simpsons” and defined by the online ‘Urban Dictionary’ as: Indifference; to be used when one simply does not care.

And that non-word pretty much sums up the entire BK experience. Which is sad. I’ve always liked BK, Angel and I had our first date at one, many, many, many years ago. I always thought of them as being somehow better than McDonald's, but now I’m not so sure. It is possible to fine-tune something into complete disrepair, and I think this may be the case at BK. Whatever new moves they’re making, for whatever reasons, this reporter is simply not impressed.

The price? Well the Chef’s Choice is a pricier burger than a whopper, so our meal came in at twenty four dollars and change. Not too bad, but a bit higher than most fast-food expectations, and nearly the price of a really good burger almost anywhere else. Jack-in-the-Box and Steak and Shake come to mind, and there’s installations of those shops in the same block as this particular Burger King. So unless my only other choice happens to be McD’s, I’m probably going to be fast-fooding elsewhere in the future.

On a sad note: Kim’s Café in Desoto, is officially closed. Kim notified me the last week of December that it was being shuttered. I knew she’d had the place up for sale, and she reported that since she put up the signs, that an already slow stream of customers had dropped by another seventy-five percent. This is too bad.  I have mentioned on many occasions that I really liked the place except for the tea. I’m wondering now if that was the crux of the problem.