Pizza Hut

201 - 203 S. Truman Blvd
Crystal City, MO
On the Interwebs.

It had been longer than we could remember since we'd had a Pizza Hut pizza. It was probably takeout. It used to be our go-to place until the Pizza Junction opened up here, closer, in Hillsboro.
We could have gone to the PH in Desoto, it's closer, but we headed to Crystal City/Festus anyhow. We knew they had moved recently, from one building in a shopping center to another. I'm pretty sure we hadn't been to either.
I asked Angel during the drive an interview-like question:
"So what is your level of expectation for Pizza Hut?"
"You mean like on a scale of one to five?"
"No, no, of course not... One to seven."
She thought for  a bit, then finally: "Four."
I thought this was an interesting answer, so I dug in.
She explained that back in the day, BPJ (before Pizza Junction) she'd always been quite satisfied with PH. "So my actual expectation is probably a bit higher than that." She amended.
It was a beautiful Autumn day, cool but not cold, bright blue October sky.
There weren't many people there.
The Place:
We were seated and then greeted by a young lady with 'Amber' on her name tag. I assumed that was her name. She handed us menus, simple, legal sized laminated cards.
"Would you like something to drink?" She asked politely.
"Why yes, yes we would." I replied and returned to casually scanning the menu.
Angel finally nudged me (poked me in the ribs with her elbow) and I looked up at Amber, she was looking at me, almost frustrated. I've recently discovered that people don't always ask the question they think they are asking and when you answer the question they actually ask, they look at you funny. Like that's my fault.
We barked out our drink demands, tea, unsweetened with no sugar, sweet tea and Pepsi.
I looked around.  The place did indeed look new.

They went with a sports theme, several big screens, thankfully muted and playing sports games. . .football, I think. On the walls were framed, full size sports shirts of game players that I'd mostly never heard of. Somebody once told me sports shirts were called 'Jerseys' which just made no sense. The garment long known as a Jersey originated on the Island of Jersey, a Crown Dependency of the United Kingdom. These knitted wool garments were the rugged and heavy predecessor of what we call a sweater. Modern sports shirts seem to be made from some sort of space age polymer and would hardly keep a man warm on the damp, wind swept island.
The tables and booths were all new and the carpet was barely worn. A nice place, if you like sports and misnamed articles of sports clothing.
The Food:
We had all decided to have pizza. Which was good since they don't really serve much else at Pizza Hut. We had also decided to get three individual pizzas. We all have favorite things on and styles of pizza, that do not sync up well. To build a 'compromise' pizza would leave at least two out of three of us less than satisfied.
So we all scanned the full range of options.

Angel likes thin crust, Adam and I prefer hand-tossed. Angel and I like the 'Supreme' Adam doesn't like veggies on his pie. Thus, three different pizzas.
As the drinks were delivered Angel and Adam had decided to get some wings, like Angel needs more wings. I rarely eat wings because they tend to spice them with acid, or whatever it is that makes a hot wing a hot wing. I've never found any I care for, at all. So they didn't even consult me. After some debate they eventually decided on  Bone-Out Asian style. Sure, fine. Just stop saying 'bone-out'
After a few minutes Amber brought some small plates, some bundled silverware and some napkins along with the wings. The wings looked like Chinese style, breaded balls, fried golden brown, with a distinct sugary smell.
Adam noticed it too. "They smell Asian." he said. I shut him down immediately. "Don't be such a racist." I scolded him. I know lots of people from Asia, they don't smell any worse than most Americans I know. How embarrassing.
I decided to go ahead and try one of the wings . .  .maybe it would be like Chinese. It sort of was, then the pepper spray element hit. Two bites, that was it. Angel and Adam seemed to like them though.
The thing with a pizza place is that there will always be a wait. We were prepared, we had devices, PH had WiFi.

Linoleum Thin Crust Supreme

Soon enough the pizzas arrived. Well, sort of. Amber led the delivery with an apology. "We made them all thin crust, we're making two more for you with the right crust, but here are the ones we made."
Well, color me impressed. Back when I worked in a pizza place we counted on botched orders, they became 'house pies' for the staff. It looks like managers finally figured that little scam out.
Yes it was a mistake, but the fact that she came out ahead of it rather than concocting some sort of cover story instantly made it not so bad.
I had one slice of the thin crust. Of course, the ingredients were all the same, so I sat and picked at them. I don't hate thin crust, I just prefer something a little more substantial, with a flavor and texture less like linoleum.

Hand Tossed Supreme

A while later Amber returned with drink refills and a question. "Would you like the hand tossed pizzas in a box?"

"No, we'd prefer these two in a box." I answered, pointing to mine and Adam's, which were mostly intact.
She brought a couple of boxes, followed shortly by our original choice pizzas. Angel was about a third of the way through hers.
I goofed up because I was hungry. I broke off one slice and stuck it into my face. The four hundred degree sticky cheese stuck to my tongue and sent shock waves through my system. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
I let the next one cool, I drank a little more of my stale and weak tea. Finally I was able to eat the thing.

Hand Tossed Pepperoni Lover's

It was kind of sloppy looking, hurried. It looked as though the kitchen might have rushed it through since it was to make up for a mistake. The toppings looked as though they were arranged with help from a hand grenade. Though the crust did have the signature poofy spots, which I love, the bottom of the crust wasn't faring well. It was  turning soggy and was disintegrating. I noticed that this pie had bigger, deeper puddles of grease, a little off-putting. By the third small piece, I was basically scooping the hot mess off the plate with my fingers, it was coming apart. I didn't get halfway through it before I slid the remains into my box. Adam did likewise. Angel had one slice left, we added it. We ended up taking away nearly three full pizzas.
Angel liked it though, she really likes, and I share this sentiment, the large, chunky peppers, mushrooms and onions. We also liked the sausage.
We always order too much pizza, that's because we all like breakfast pizza.
Summary:
The bill came to forty six bucks, not bad for five pizzas and eight chicken nuggets, I suppose, but we weren't paying for five pizzas, just three. This seemed a bit pricy for industrial pizzas.
By industrial, I mean 'franchise'.
If you can't make it yourself, you get somebody to make pizza for you. If you are going to buy a pizza,

there's a hierarchy. 1. Privately owned and operated places. 2. Franchises, 3. Frozen.
Private individuals that operate pizza places care about their food first and foremost. You can usually taste that passion. Franchises are businesses bought up by business people. They want to make as much money with as little expense as is possible. Some may be passionate about the pies, but not usually. In most cases the recipes are not even their own.
Frozen is what you eat when no one's watching. It's not really that much cheaper for a brand name frozen pizza than at a pizzeria, but you can eat it when you are alone and too lazy to actually prepare food.
All in all, for a franchise pizza, this was pretty good. Not nearly as good as Pizza Junction, or dozens of other places around the area, but if you want a fast, simple, satisfying pizza, this is a good place.
Amber did an exemplary job of handling a tough problem. I liked that. Mistakes are going to happen. Places get into more trouble when they try to cover it up. She kept the drinks refilled, the bill came quick. Excellent service.
We'll probably go back sometime, but probably not for a while. There's just too many great pizzerias in the area to settle for his very often.

Lorenzo's

106 Main St.
Desoto, Mo.
On the web
Facebook

A few days ago on a certain social media site, someone in one of the county groups I follow, said they were moving to Desoto and wanted to know about restaurants there that other members could recommend. Lorenzo's jumped into my head immediately, but when I was about to comment, I noticed that several other people already had, more so than any other place.
There are some fine eateries in and around Desoto, but it was this place that I thought of first.
Coincidentally, when Angel came up with a list of two or three places for this outing, I chose Lorenzo's.
The Place:
It sits on Main street, across form the tracks. On the other side of the tracks, sure enough, property values drop.
Main street is old style, mid 20th century, small town brick store fronts. It even still has an old-school movie theater.
Lorenzo's sits adjacent to a vacant spot, where they've set up a patio. They're known to frequently get a projector and show ballgames on the wall of the next building.
It was a nice, some would say perfect, evening for sitting outside, but we didn't. We went in and were led to a booth pretty close to the last booth we sat at.
Charlotte brought us some menus and asked about drinks. Lorenzo's serves many, many beers and wines, so we got unsweet tea, sweet tea and Coke.
I like wine. I'm okay with beer. My problem with beer is that it is too filling to have with a meal. My problem with wine is snobs. If I had wine with my meal I'd have to rate it, and that is very hard to do without it coming to fisticuffs between myself, a simple man with simple tastes, and the snobs. They're a violent bunch and not as dainty as you might imagine.

The Food:
"I don't think I want pizza." Angel had declared. I kind of did. They serve a little nine incher at a very
reasonable price, $6.35 with up to six toppings. That's a lot of toppings. And they have some good ones. The standards, of course, but they also have 'gourmet toppings' including, from their website:
Anchovies, Artichoke Hearts, Basil Pesto, Capicolla Ham, Fresh Mozzarella, Fresh Spinach, Goat Cheese crumbles, Gorgonzola Cheese, Grilled Chicken, Meatball, Minced Garlic, Prosciutto di Parma, Ricotta Cheese, Shrimp, Volpi Salami.
Yeah. . . I know.
They also have a selection of sauces and cheeses.
I designed my own.
Traditional sauce, traditional cheese, topped with onions, bell pepper, Italian sausage, bacon, pepperoni and to spice it up a bit, pickled banana peppers.
Adam bought one off the rack, the so-named 'Sicilian', traditional sauce, mozzarella cheese, Italian sausage, pepperoni, Capicolla Ham and fresh basil.
Angel changed her mind. Her pizza was embarrassing. Garlic butter sauce, St. Louis style (Provel) cheese, black olives, mushrooms, sausage, onions, grilled chicken. To me, this didn't sound like pizza at all. Even less so when she informed us that she almost added artichokes. Seriously, artichoke. . . on a pizza. . . embarrassing.
Of course, the forgone conclusion, for an appetizer we were unanimous in wanting the deep fried cannelloni.
We get this every time. It's Lorenzo's one up of the traditional and generic (in the St. Louis area) fried ravioli. It's better, much better. The appetizer cost more than any of our pizzas, but it was gone in a couple of  minutes. They make their own. . . everything, sauces, sausages, everything there. The blend of meat in these bites is, as I've put it before, buttery in texture and smokey and savory, but not spicy, in taste.
Angel thought they'd been cooked too long, too crispy, Adam and I disagreed, as there is no such thing as too crispy. The signature, house made marinara sauce coated the crispy, buttery bits with a fresh sweetness that you cannot get out of a can.
We waited patiently for the pizzas, they are built to order and should not be rushed. We had our e-devices so we were entertained without actually having to hold conversations with each other. Lorenzo's has wifi, but you have to have the password. I asked for it and was told it was the zip code, which I didn't know, but I do now. So we sat there and privately swiped and tapped. The big-band, Italian-ish crooners filled the room with ambiance. Frank Sinatra, Peggy Lee, Dean Martin, etc.
The pies arrived. None of us has ever been able to eat the whole thing in one sitting, but that's a plus. Two words, 'breakfast pizza'. 
Mine was, by far, the prettiest pie. The bright yellow banana peppers, the green bells, the sauce and the cheese was a delicious looking palette. We all noticed that the pizzas had been sliced in quarters, too large to handle. There were knives along with other cutlery in a Mason jar on the table. Each quarter got sliced in half.
Be prepared though, these things come to you hotter than the surface of Venus (860° F). Do not dive right in, wait for it, wait for it. . .
The crust was thin, not cracker thin, but certainly not thick. It was also very good. Not too yeasty or oregano-y. Just a perfectly simple crust that does not need to be stuffed with anything. I finally did get to bite in and was perfectly satisfied. The banana pepper was a great addition, a new, different taste to the more traditional toppings. The little vinegar-y things were thankfully sparse and thus, did not overwhelm.

Adam's pie was mostly meat, with a sprinkling of
chopped basil to offset the otherwise bland colors. Adam is a pizza professional, capable of making a great pie himself at the place he works. Even though he eschews vegetables, onions, peppers, etc, himself, he respects them, his opinion counted for something. He was quite pleased.
Angel's atrocity was also nice to look at, but wrong, just wrong. No tomato sauce, chunks of chicken, and knowing that it was slathered in Provel 'cheese' rather than mozzarella, as God intended, she bit into it as if it were perfectly normal. Provel, a primary component of St. Louis style, is a blend of cheeses made specifically for the region. I've never cared much for it myself, it comes across as a bit sweet. Sure the texture is great, it doesn't harden as it cools, but for me the taste is one-off. Sure enough, the richness of the cheese had her stop about halfway through. Well, we all stopped about halfway through. The fresh ingredients and sauces

and cheeses make this pizza rich, and very filling.
Charlotte brought us boxes, and the check.
Summary:
 I told Angel that this would be a very difficult review to write. A good story requires conflict. There was none. Zero. The whole experience was pleasant, efficient, relaxed, tasty and just plain good. Okay, the tea was pretty weak, but that's it. Lorenzo makes seriously good pasta dishes and can also toss out an exceptional pizza, one of the best in the county, if not beyond. The price was more than reasonable, an appetizer and three pizzas for thirty four dollars and change. . . three six-topping pizzas! The staff was efficient, precise and experienced, very, very few slip ups in our many visits. The place itself is cozy and 'warm'. Even the music fits the place perfectly. I not only think Lorenzo's makes one of the best pizzas in the area, but on the whole, I'd go so far as to say that it is among the best restaurants as well.
Highly, highly recommended!

Pizza Junction

 Hillsboro. Mo
 On Facebook

* Very important disclaimer at the end of this post!


This choice was obvious. It's a brand new place in Hillsboro that we'd been been eagerly awaiting to open.
Before we start though, I'd like to give a shout out to a new friend, Suzi. She sent a nice email this past week and called Eat and Critique ". . .one of the highlights of my week". I of course, suggested she seek immediate counseling from a certified get-a-life coach. Anyway, she was very sweet and funny, and I always appreciate hearing form you, my loyal fans, as long as you're not one of those freaky nut jobs I occasionally hear from, or a Russian spammer... what is it with those guys anyhow?
Suzi also said "You go to some horrible restaurants. . ."  I couldn't completely disagree, but I can assure you this, I may indeed go to some horrible eateries, but this particular place is not one of them, at all.

The Place:
 A few months ago Bobby Munzert's closed its doors. A nice building at the northwest corner of the intersection of Highways 21 and B. Across from the mall (Dollar General).
A few weeks ago we noticed that the Munzert's sign had finally been taken down, but we also noticed a busyness around the place. Then signs and ads started popping up indicating that the spot was about to become Pizza Junction.
Hillsboro doesn't have a pizza joint, unless you count Imo's, which I don't. I was happy to hear that someone would be giving it a shot.
We arrived for lunch on Saturday for reasons I'll explain later*. Angela and I went, Adam was at work.*
The place had not been gutted, there would have been no reason  for that, it wasn't in bad shape before. As we entered the foyer we noticed that to the right, which had been the non-smoking dining area, was now an area that could be reserved for parties. In the foyer itself some large arcade machines had been installed. The  area on the left, which had been the bar/smoking area was now a bar/dining area. It had been filled in with nice booths, several of them. The motif was brown and black, the walls a neutral cream. Several overhead fans spun quickly. The lighting was muted, but more brightly than Munzert's had been. It smelled much better that I had remembered it, it now carried the narcotic aroma of yeast and garlic.
    It wasn't very busy when we arrived so we were told to sit wherever we liked. Two or three wall mounted TV's were on, muted, and I breathed a sigh of relief when I noticed they were not tuned to sports, but rather, the Discovery Channel. Finally, a bar/pizza joint that didn't assume that their patrons need a 24/7 sports fix.
On the back wall was a new-style jukebox, wall mounted, playing something contemporary. I'm not in to the music the kids are into these days, at least it wasn't too loud or offensive.
We sat back against the wall, I turned sideways and took up the entire bench. Sydney brought us the menus.
We snickered. The plain paper menus had been glued to a part of a pizza box lid. Cute.
We ordered our drinks, tea and sweet tea.
The menu was three pages, one for pizza the others dedicated to sandwiches, salads, etc.
I was tempted by the lighter salads, and sandwiches... yeah, right...PIZZA!
The Food:
There were a few pre-defined pizzas and they looked okay. But the interesting choice of toppings for a free-style was too good to pass up.
I made up my mind on a nine inch, traditional crust, with crab meat, pepperoni, Italian sausage, green peppers and onions. Yeah, Crab meat!
Angel picked a niner as well, thin crust, because she doesn't understand pizza. She topped it with shrimp, Italian sausage, black olives and mushrooms.
I was tempted to add another interesting option, sauerkraut. I know! Long time fans will realize the karmic irony of this from this review.
We assumed Adam would want some when he got home from work, so we also asked for a twelve inch  traditional 'Junction', to-go from the pre-defined list. It contained mostly meats. A twleve incher so we could all share it with him and not have to prepare any meals for the rest of the weekend. Mmmm, breakfast pizza.
While we waited I glanced around, taking in the changes. I liked it. It opens at eleven most days, and offers wi-fi. We wondered aloud about how Adam was doing at his new job. He'd only started the previous weekend, part time, but he seemed to like it.

12" 'Junction'

The aroma reminded me of the pizza places I'd worked at. Garcia's Pizza in a Pan in Rantoul, Illinois, (home of the Flying Tomato Brothers.) They had customized delivery cars, AMC Pacers, decorated with green plastic stems on their tops, you know, so it looked like a tomato.
I also worked at one in Springfield, I don't recall the name. I was officially a delivery driver at both, used my own car to get the mileage reimbursement. I also worked the back and learned a few tips and techniques of the business. The delivery bit also permanently odored my cars with that same delicious smell that I swooned over when I first stepped in this place, yeast and garlic. Lovely, simply lovely.
We watched the muted TV's, closed captioning was enabled. As best we could tell this was one of the newer reality shows devoted to documenting the stupid things rural hicks are willing to do to sustain a reality show.

Mine

In this episode the silly hillbillies were picking through a landfill for fortune and fame and then went out at night, hunting for mythological creatures. I didn't actually see any laying around, but I assumed copious amounts of alcohol were involved.
The pizzas arrived soon enough. They looked great. I knew I'd like mine, I'd already had a sample of one of the Junction's pizza's the weekend before*.
Sure enough it was thick, gooey, generously topped,  and very, very cheesy.
It looked bigger than nine inches, but I'm a guy and can't estimate sizes like that very accurately. The toppings and cheese extended all the way to the edges, no cutting of corners here. It seemed massive, I knew I wouldn't be able to finish the whole thing. That's what they make boxes for though.
The tea was okay, it wasn't too old or bitter.(insert wife joke here if you like, I won't. Angel occasionally reads these things.)

Angel's

Angel and I savored our pies. These were really, really good. She mentioned what I just did, that the toppings were generous and filled out to the edges. The crust was perfect, charred a little at the edges for some crispiness, not too thick to be too filling, perfect. The sauce, which I knew to be made in-house*, was great, once again nothing flashy, but good, fresh and generous. I came across the lumps of crab, I'd never had crab on a pizza before, I  can't recall it even having ever been an option. It was subtle, compared to the sausage, and I might have not even noticed it had I not been looking for it. But that's the nature of crab. The peppers and onions were finely chopped, I prefer larger pieces but that was a minor point.
 Most St. Louis Style shops and pies default to provel, that regionally popular, sweeter cheese blend. It's offered as an option at the junction though. Ours had a more 'traditional' provolone and mozzarella blend.  They also have different sauces, but I highly recommend the house sauce.
Summary:
 Sure enough, I only made it halfway through. Angel, probably because of her wafer-thin crust, finished all but one square. We had absolutely nothing to complain about, this was seriously good pizza.
Yeah, that good, better than all the local franchises, by far. There was obvious attention to quality and flavors.
The service was pretty good. I'm going to give them a break on the few minor serving errors. They've only been open a week and they hired the staff less than two weeks ago. The fact that Sydney came back to our table twice to confirm some details about our order I actually appreciated. She seemed to be working hard to get our order right, not just get it over with. She'll work out fine.
One more minor thing, easily fixable. There were no napkins on the tables. This was a problem as pizza, a hand-food, is messy. Especially if it is made well, and this was. We had to ask for napkin refills, but like I said, easily fixable. Angel pointed out that they also didn't offer silverware/plates like some of the snootier pizza joints did. I didn't see it as a problem and frankly, it didn't seem to slow Angel down much.
The bill for the two customized pies and the big take-home standard came to forty seven dollars and change. that sounds like a lot, but remember, breakfast pizza, mmmmmm! We ordered thirty combined inches (9+9+12)of pizza, that comes down to a little more than a buck an inch. Don't make me do the math for you.
I wish I could get  there for lunch during the week, they offer a pizza and salad buffet for a very reasonable price.
I highly recommend Pizza Junction. I'm always excited when a new place opens up in my adopted hometown, especially when it works hard to serve quality food at a good price. Pizza Junction succeeds at this, even in their first week.

* Disclaimer.
Yeah, now for all those asterisks. 
If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, I am not a professional journalist. I'm a writer, a clown, and a very emotionally fragile and needy, yet undeniably handsome man. I do have ethics though, so I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that Adam's new job is at this very place, Pizza Junction. That's how I'd known it was good pizza, he'd brought some home after the soft-opening the previous weekend. He was in the back on this very day, and probably helped prepare our pies. We never saw him while we were there and we didn't want to skew the experience or interfere with his work, so we did not introduce ourselves. He pretty much guessed it though, six ingredients each on a pair of nine inch pies caught his attention, especially the shrimp and crab toppings. Not their typical orders. The sauerkraut would have nailed it.
So am I biased in my review? Maybe? No, not at all. I decided ahead of time that if it was bad, or worse, awful, that I'd recuse myself from reviewing it.
I did enjoy it though, I highly recommend it, whether Adam works there or not. It's a local place in a small town and I'm bound to have some sort of connection through family/friends at any locally owned place.
But I figured I better be up front with you about the familial connection.
Seriously, try it.